Monday, August 15, 2011

You know you are in South Africa when...

You know you are in South Africa when:

- Countries like Cuba and Venezuela are admired as roll models.

- Jobs are left vacant rather than appointing qualified applicants from the "wrong" ethnic groups.

- Prominent politicians believe that nationalising private property will create wealth and prosperity.

- Senior officials and cabinet ministers who fail are redeployed or rewarded with jobs as ambassadors.

- R2.4bn is loaned to a corrupt and failed neighbouring country while millions of jobless poor live in squatter camps.

- Less than 10% of the population is constantly blamed for lack of success by the majority.

- The president listens passively while his top youth leader labels whites as thieves.

- People protest violently against corruption and maladministration in the government but still vote for it.

- The media is labelled as unpatriotic for reporting government corruption and failure.

- A university lecturer lies about his qualifications but retains his position with full support from Council.

- A Youth leader expresses his intention to create a regime change in a stable neighbouring country.

- Politicians have a say in the selection of sport teams.

- The president, husband of several wives and father of many children, also has a fiancĂ©. 


- you have the leader of a Youth League who is almost middle aged not a youth, but has the intelect of a village idiot.

-a commission is set up to study the findings of a commission set up to study the findings of a commission set-up.

-obtaining a real, absolutely not false, truly genuine, not fake at all, valid for all classes of vehicles, non-expiring drivers license is as easy as withdrawing R500 from an automated bankteller.

-the ease of obtaining a university degree is relative to the amount of cash contained in an unmarked envelope.

you are issued with a Cuban dictionary and phrase book when admitted to a South African government hospital.

-tax is levied on the waters falling from heaven on a piece of farmland ( in other countries known as rain ).

-you notice a bumper sticker stating “Have you been hugged by a mugger today ?”.

-when the “tarred” part of the words “tarred national roads between towns/cities” on any map, refer to the history of the road and not its present condition.

-special mud splash pools are provided in the suburbs to parking lot pampered 4x4’s for that rugged country look.

-you dial an existing telephone number only to be told by a “computer” voice to dial directory enquiries, which you do only to be told by the same “computer” voice that the enquiry service is presently unavailable.

-mugging overtakes soccer as the most popular national sport.

-the time elapsed in a public parking bay does not necessarily correspond to the return of the owner of the vehicle, but whether the vehicle could be ‘hotwired’ or not.

All the "TRIMMINGS" of a BANANA REPUBLIC!!!

Now shall we all rise and sing the National Anthem together?

" Nkosi Sikalele e Banana RE PUB LEEK...."


http://www.news24.com/MyNews24/Letters/You-know-you-are-in-South-Africa-when-20110815

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